Heritage Day

Today is my last day


I manage to crawl off the bed that ceased to be coupled almost a decade ago

then land in my still relatively tiny bathroom, though my own physique seems to be shrinking by the second now

I look up at my reflection and I realise the purpose of mirrors

There is a headline,

my face

wrinkled and grey beneath its letters seems to unfold like an over ripe flower without ever having been touched

it says;

Heritage Day

I shuffle along until I trip over the now almost dry white board marker and I begin the list:

One: I inherited the dark lines of deceit off my mother’s core

Two: I learned how to live with being a liar

Three: I came as a foreign being full of love

Four: I was denied love but I’m still leaving filled with only those four letters

Five: Life was beautiful though the darkness is always the beginning of a new story

Six: I inherited the art

Seven: I will never forget


I rinse myself off and decide that it would be better to leave full of hope

After all

3 months before they expected me I was ready

13 years before I was

they weren’t

my family


The wardrobe whispered the call of majesty

I obeyed my longing eyes

past the dioors and my goodbye suit

I found the two letter phrase barely in disguise and I remembered why

Heritage day:

One: I learned how to judge myself better than anyone had ever judged me

Two: It wasn’t always sunny

Three: How to fake the smile through heartache

Four: How to cause the same

Five: My clothes are cheap

Six: I am unworthychocolat_l

Seven: I knew this each time we made eye contact… after all; we are self proclaimed judges


So neat, tidy and fresh I walk towards the lonely seat and the non functional tv

and on the top right hand corner of the screen

A phrase in white paint screams out at me

Heritage Day:

One: My skin colour murdered my first love

Two: I inherited the skill of not caring much for those attributes

Three: My father Died of a broken heart

Four: You saved mine

Five: Our life was puzzled together by vibes and muted sentences

Six: In the end, my quirks were irrelevant and your were my indica

Seven: I fell eternally asleep with the very thoughts that days and nights before had always haunted me.


Palm on palm now

My eye lids find their space

No tears left in me

My heritage day is eternal

and I only grew to know that the moment I looked into you!






Circles Of Meaning, Labyrinths of Fear – A Review

‘The twenty two relationships of a spiritual life and culture – and why they need protection’

Yet another from Moon Books’gems!

This wasn’t an easy book to put down, yet it was necessary to do that from time to time in order to get the full message of it!

We all know that there are certain ways of different cultures and religions, including sacred rights, days of celebration, and fewer know that even some day to day routines are also rooted in the sacred.

This concise eye-opener could not have come at a better time, for our generation is possibly among the most fearful the universe will ever experience!

The pages and messages and lessons are honestly comforting for a time when the silence is scarce and the noise is utterly scary.

‘The Good Life’ as Mr. Brendan Myers describes it, becomes less of an abstract, almost unreachable idea and simplifies it in ways that once read cannot be forgotten.

Learning the relationships between yourself and the landscape, the neighborhood, animals, doctors… to name a few; is the lightest, most pleasant melody of an alarm that wakes you to discover that you have just begun experiencing life at its true pace and meaning for the very first time.

A must read for the truth seeking soul.

Circles of Meaning, Labyrinths of Fear – For those of you more curious here’s the link that will help get hold of this one.

Love and Light!

Canis Lupus

Black Eyed Wolf

Today is Bornforcopper’s 3rd Birthday.

It sincerely does not feel like I have been writing as much the past while and it clearly shows in my stats. I must thank all of my readers though, for their consistency in reading my posts. A constant of about 1 000 views/year is a pleasant surprise, although I would really like to know which of you truly feel like a part of this chaotic blog.

Initially I was going to research the rarity of a black eyed wolf; in fact – according to net stats; no such wolves exist (except for werewolves of course). The last while I have been fortunate enough to learn so much from so many different sources… Nimue Brown and her Druid Life blog should probably take most of the credit, and of course Moon Books for their wonderful choice of Books and the opportunity to read and review treasures still to be discovered by the rest of the world: It feels truly amazing to be able to work within this community of relative connection and understanding. To Penton SA and Damon’s hard work – I take my beanie off to you since I do not own a hat.

The point is that while working through the rubbish to find the real stuff, I have begun to really understand what wolves must feel like while hunting. I feel like a spiritual hunter for truth; (here I would have said that nonsense reeks and that anyone would be able to deny it, but unfortunately closed-minded ignorance is very much a part of this seemingly beautiful world.)

Working with people and their goals as of late, I have begun to realize that it really should be a temporary thing trying to improve the state of Homo Sapiens as it is almost as impossible as finding a black eyed wolf…

Yet here I am; with eyes darker than what most people are accustomed to – humans are majorly subject to change character according to their surroundings and circumstances (sorry fellow Geminians ; we are not the only ones with that magical ability)… therefore I believe in the inherently good nature of humans. As long as one is willing to strip themselves down to the core and begin to find out where they are rooted; as long as one is willing to accept responsibility and not be disheartened by the truth: I believe that true evolution need not be just a dream.

I therefore have created a group which will aim to focus on all the good things and also the areas in which we could all improve! I urge all my followers and readers to visit www.facebook.com/blackeyedwolves and get involved with little bits in whichever areas interest them. Remember this is to try strip down the bad stuff and focus on the good stuff.

Thank you again for supporting me for the last 3 years and I am looking forward to 3 more.

All my love


Poison Pen Letters To Myself (and John) Review

All credit goes to Romany Rivers whose undeniable talent inspired this piece. Thank you kindly.

Dear John

Before Bedtime I stumbled upon a magical piece of Unconscious Creativity.
Each Question felt like The Pulling of My Faith…
Uncertain I kept Passing Through ancient lands;

their Once Upon A Time… threw me into Scrying for a little piece of what potential may have still been possible for me…

On Reflection
The Moral Masquerade coats my layers of Hate, of Fat Happy Pre-packaged Dreams,  and with these Musings of Undine spirits and matters of Red Letters… I will Return To Sender or Keep Searching for
The Freak
That only Home
My Addressee Unknown

Smiling Again
I keep swiping through each page of the only bits of Hope for Our Millenium in the form of skilfully composed sentences… and I Pray for Dedication Beyond Tomorrow from every Universal Self in order to eliminate possibilities of such Remote Suicide With This Light that touches even the Deep scars of Primal Torture that should by now be dead, but instaed lay dormant inside the Lake of Unshed.

I left some Brandy for Brian out on the counter last night…
John; I wish that you have stopped being Bitter.
If you could see this Vale of Tears
This Desert Tongue that faithfully fails me Without A Trace of Stitches…
Then I would look at you through Blind Eyes
These words would include you in a cosmic Tribe
And each night before you Sleep
Green Upon Black Destiny
Will bless you with no Infernal layers of despair; only contented comfortable butterflies being born in the pit of your stomach…

Yet your eyes refuse to read or see
Never Mind

Prove Your Point (carry on)

Brendan Howlin and The Secret of Urban Druidry (A Review of The Handbook Of Urban Druidry)

The very first book on Druidry I managed to get my hands on was an exciting part of my life but also rather crippling. I started off excited about the idea of Druidry and what it meant to be one, but according to the book I held in my palms;it was rather impossible for me to become that as I was not anywhere near a forest, country side or any sort of quiet place. The hum of the city street was as close as I could get to nature during the day time and at night I was always at work which also didn’t help at all.

Brendan Howlin is a member of the order of Bards, Ovates and Druids (OBOD) and has been a SIT for Bards and Ovates; The Handbook of Urban Druidry written by Brendan himself, came (for me) at a time when I was comfortable to live as a lost unfettered just because the prospect of any spiritual path posed more set backs than benefits. Reading  this book; one’s ears seem to automatically tap into that wave of being one with everything and realizing that even the chaotic city is in its own right sacred and could very well be just as solid as any forest foundation for magical purpose and outcome.

This also brings me (as a side note) to the topic of differentiating magic, there is no form of it that is lesser or greater than the other, the outcome of anything depends mainly on the wielder, the student, the teacher.

Again I would like to emphasize that my reviews never focus on giving away too many facts on the book itself but focusing on the main aim, and hoping that this little whisper of what is out there will inspire you to get out there and experience more by reading, writing or simply being.

Moon Books always seem to pick out the glitter in the rubble, this time a helping hand for those of you who like me would love to learn more about how to practice Druidry without allowing the city life to become a hurdle.

Job very well done Mr. Howlin

The urban wolves of the world salute you.


Mother Goose or Mother Goddess – A Review Of Jeri Studebaker’s Latest Piece

For many, the Mother Goose character was simply an image that brought scents of warm bread and fresh soup into mind as little children sat tucked under a blanket with a book. However , for Jeri Studbaker it seemed just a little mysterious how it seemed to disguise the Mother Goddess (Mother Goose), at a time wBreaking The Mother Goose Codehen the montheistic churches were the rulers of Europe – what better way to preserve and pass down the culture of this deity than through stories for children, stories that shape so much of our character and who we end up in the long run?

If this notion stirs in you the ambition to find out more about this magical and wonderful possibility then I suggest that you definitely give Breaking the Mother Goose Code: How a Fairy-Tale Character Fooled the World for 300 Years by Jeri Studebaker a read. It took me a while to finish reading this jem simply because I did not want to get to the end, I wanted to keep being surprised for as long as possible. Alas! All things must end but the lessons we take from these things need never fade or get old.

It is very much like an encyclopedia on the topic of this hidden character beneath the character, we are given all the examples… the things that set the light bulb in your mind off and life simply cannot be as dull anymore,

I could go into the way Jeri explains the Nursery Rhyme or the different Deities and how they are represented by her, as I believe many other reviewers have done… In this review I could prove to myself that the message of the book has truly made an impact by taking you through her evidence, but then it takes away from the mystery of the notion, and that is a simple tragedy for any reader who finds his/herself in the midst of a magic as this book undoubtedly is.

So go on.

Find a few fairy tales… settle down with a cup of soup or tea, re-familiarize yourselves with Mother Goose and then: Let Jeri and Moon Books take you on the most comforting journey yet.


Druidry and Prayer – A Review

It is just before midnight in a small, stuffy, but comfortable enough room to feel like home and I certainly am not fully aware of what I am writing; I find this is the best time to actually take it on. In my previous blog post: Experiencing The Storm I had only begun reading a book which in a matter of moments helped change my outlook on life.
I wanted to write the review in a formal manner, I  was going to research and practice until I felt I knew how best to write this (as if any formality or craftsmanship could ever do this piece justice).
When it comes to Nimue Brown’s work (the bits I have  been fortunate enough to read) I feel like a sort of groupie, never having anything but amazing things to not only say, but also feel.

‘Hello! Would it be so wrong of me to say, that I dislike religion to such an extent that I get nauseous just reading the word?’

Druidry and Prayer is not a self help book (because I cannot stomach those)… neither is it your conventional guide to being spiritual (those taste like cardboard in my mind) – it is the calming tablet for an uneasy mind…

The uneasy mind which loses sleep more often than not, because the ignorance of the world and its politics drives it to a point of maddening anger; because life is shit and there definitely would be no comfort in performing a mindless hand-me-down ritual of a religion that is filthier than the most neglected sewerage place thingy.

What I appreciate most about this book is that right in the beginning we are soothed and our doubts as to, whether or not we made a mistake opening the book  are erased as we are taken through the context of otherwise sickening words… for example,
‘ Religion: For me a religion is a formal and proscribed social structure with functions that can be understood entirely in social and psychological terms. ‘
Had this not been part of the book, I probably would have not carried on much further with it.
‘Talking about Gods’ in itself helps broaden your perspective and prepares you for an easy to swallow reality check.

I could ramble on about all the bits of the book that resonated and the bits I am certain will have an effect on any and every person who does read it all the way through, but why spoil this magical journey for the rest of you?

‘Dear whatever is out there, I climbed out of my self made grave because you threw at me a thing I would have never imagined could exist.’

Let’s forget all we have been spoon-fed, let’s work on the magic within ourselves and in the process empower those around us who need it most.

If there is one book I would say is a necessity to have read; Druidry and Prayer by Nimue Brown would be it. I’d have someone read it to me when the time comes and I begin chasing the white light – really… I would.

Graceful Nature

Last week’s shrink-time brought with it a series of thoughts that I would like to share with you and I hope that the majority of you will be able to appreciate where this comes from.

Throughout the ages Christianity and Paganism have largely been at war with one another. Whether or not this is justifiable is not for me to decide and I am not going into that right now. I do however believe that Grace is an absolutely stunning concept and today I want to write a little about it.

In Christianity ‘Grace’ is the favor of God upon us… the forgiveness and blessing for those of us who admit our mishaps and believe… for those willing to walk the Christian path. Going deeper into it – Grace was given when Jesus of Nazareth died on a cross in order to re-kindle man’s relationship to God (aka Jesus’ papa).

Although this is a fairy minimal description of Grace, it is a big concept to grasp at first.

Please understand that as someone with a big Christian background I will always see the beauty in many of its teachings; however I am in no way trying to force my views on anyone. This is a blog and as such I feel free to write about ALMOST anything my heart desires.

So yesterday I was thinking about what Grace would mean to me as a Druid. I picked my brain apart but I just could not get to anything…

What is Grace for a Druid?

IS there Grace for a Druid?

Why is grace so important to me?

Later in the evening I was walking around feeling guilty about something I’d done and I instinctively looked up at the clouds (which by the way is the way I deal with my stuff [most times]) as I looked up at the grey formation of cotton-wool images… one rain drop kissed my face, then another so before I knew it I was staring at the sky as the much-anticipated first rain had finally made an appearance.

Well that’s when I figured that there really is Grace for a Druid, and personally I find it to be much bigger than the previously mentioned one. There are rain-drops that won’t avoid showering you to the bone because you insulted someone… there are autumn leaves that will dance happily around even if you’ve just broken someone’s little heart; we’re human we’re small and imperfect, some forgive and some don’t but regardless of the outcome Nature is ever constant. Some say she’s ever changing, I say ever re-incarnating. How about you?

I never want to lose faith in the notion that somewhere in every living thing is rooted an infinite goodness.

Faith, love, magic and nature… the reasons I picked the path I tread.