Heritage Day

1

Today is my last day

 

I manage to crawl off the bed that ceased to be coupled almost a decade ago

then land in my still relatively tiny bathroom, though my own physique seems to be shrinking by the second now

I look up at my reflection and I realise the purpose of mirrors

There is a headline,

my face

wrinkled and grey beneath its letters seems to unfold like an over ripe flower without ever having been touched

it says;

Heritage Day

I shuffle along until I trip over the now almost dry white board marker and I begin the list:

One: I inherited the dark lines of deceit off my mother’s core

Two: I learned how to live with being a liar

Three: I came as a foreign being full of love

Four: I was denied love but I’m still leaving filled with only those four letters

Five: Life was beautiful though the darkness is always the beginning of a new story

Six: I inherited the art

Seven: I will never forget

 

I rinse myself off and decide that it would be better to leave full of hope

After all

3 months before they expected me I was ready

13 years before I was

they weren’t

my family

 

The wardrobe whispered the call of majesty

I obeyed my longing eyes

past the dioors and my goodbye suit

I found the two letter phrase barely in disguise and I remembered why

Heritage day:

One: I learned how to judge myself better than anyone had ever judged me

Two: It wasn’t always sunny

Three: How to fake the smile through heartache

Four: How to cause the same

Five: My clothes are cheap

Six: I am unworthychocolat_l

Seven: I knew this each time we made eye contact… after all; we are self proclaimed judges

 

So neat, tidy and fresh I walk towards the lonely seat and the non functional tv

and on the top right hand corner of the screen

A phrase in white paint screams out at me

Heritage Day:

One: My skin colour murdered my first love

Two: I inherited the skill of not caring much for those attributes

Three: My father Died of a broken heart

Four: You saved mine

Five: Our life was puzzled together by vibes and muted sentences

Six: In the end, my quirks were irrelevant and your were my indica

Seven: I fell eternally asleep with the very thoughts that days and nights before had always haunted me.

 

Palm on palm now

My eye lids find their space

No tears left in me

My heritage day is eternal

and I only grew to know that the moment I looked into you!

 

 

 

 

No Title Would Suffice

2

1 Fox – 31 January 2015

Miracles happened the night Amanda Palmer rose like a phoenix out from under the cramped, cripples of sweaty armpits barely poised in waves of hysteria. I have never been a kiss-ass so let me be honest about where I stood in this scenario. Having always been a frantic Neil Gaiman fan I figured it wouldn’t hurt to witness the talent of the woman so loved by not only him but her fans as well. My lovely girlfriend had announced to me about 10 days prior that whatever plans we had for the 30th were now cancelled because Amanda Palmer was going to be performing and apart from thinking how disgustingly romantic the whole thing was to me… I must admit I did have those inexplicable butterflies of premonition.

1044455_637239739720994_360263404745826093_nHaving arrived at 15:00 to wait in line behind the personages that are her fans, one (although ordinary and unable to have the privilege of interviewing Amanda herself) could paint a portrait much more colorful and pleasant than that of many so called ‘super stars.’ The 28th of January was a house party held by none other than hers truly for the more dedicated of her SA fans and by the sound of it (which made me more hungry and grumpy than I already was at that point) there were a lot of rusks… There’s something wonderful about knowing that your rusks given as a gift would not be insulting to the receiver but on the contrary; appreciated immensely.

So there I was: staring at the empty space and looking at the microphone being totally clueless about what Amanda Palmer’s music was about; I kept nudging my girlfriend and moaning about how I desperately wished Neil Gaiman would have accompanied his wife so that my hungry eyes could stare in awe at both of them. Soon we engaged in conversations about creating… she mostly listened to me (as admittedly she does 95% of our relationship) and we got lost, in among all the good smells of Balkan Burgers,wine and all types of creatives.

1920485_638001532978148_786165877954101770_nThe bubble wrap to the left was actually in the shape of an Octopus, it was one of the great distractions to Amanda’s Grand Entree and it also was a gigantic fanning device. To me though, the Festival style Dragon, the butterfly Man and the rest of the creepy crowd crawlies ; reminded me of Mirror Mask – Written by Neil Gaiman and Designed by Dave McKean. So that’s how it began for me, comparing every little detail of the night to every little detail I’ve seen in Neil’s work. Now I am not an engaged fan, but from that night I vowed to change that. As I watched and listened to her perform Creep by Radiohead on her ukulele, I felt my soul drift off into a space that I had previously not been able to reach but always yearned for.

10440274_638001392978162_5213238944561282047_nI could rant on for eons about the atmosphere and genuine mastery of the evening. I could pretend that I know all about her musical history… truth is I don’t know much about any of that, only that we were all at the right place at the right time, and none of us will ever forget what the map of Tasmania looks like… we won’t forget that a woman needs not shave their own in order to be feminine or acceptable and in truth we should all know that we are exactly the people we have wanted to be. Her passion is fearsome, her playing the keyboard was at times so fast that I really struggled to take a decent photo. Not only does she accept rusks for presents, Amanda also played the keyboard standing the entire night and although that may not seem like a big deal I was close enough to witness the little physical evidences of her fatigue.

1797513_638000076311627_6251495066725619534_nSo my pledge is that when Amanda (this time with Neil) decides to visit us again, I will share it with you as soon as I read it, also that I will learn the lyrics to her songs so that I too may scream my heart out, and last but not least I pledge to be a less grumpy girlfriend who listens more and speaks less and who trusts her girlfriends judgement because clearly; she couldn’t ever be wrong.

Thank you for sharing the night with us Amanda, South Africa as a whole benefited from the magic you  spread that evening, thank you to all my readers. This is it for tonight : Iva10425146_638001639644804_8200265462630371444_n