Heritage Day

1

Today is my last day

 

I manage to crawl off the bed that ceased to be coupled almost a decade ago

then land in my still relatively tiny bathroom, though my own physique seems to be shrinking by the second now

I look up at my reflection and I realise the purpose of mirrors

There is a headline,

my face

wrinkled and grey beneath its letters seems to unfold like an over ripe flower without ever having been touched

it says;

Heritage Day

I shuffle along until I trip over the now almost dry white board marker and I begin the list:

One: I inherited the dark lines of deceit off my mother’s core

Two: I learned how to live with being a liar

Three: I came as a foreign being full of love

Four: I was denied love but I’m still leaving filled with only those four letters

Five: Life was beautiful though the darkness is always the beginning of a new story

Six: I inherited the art

Seven: I will never forget

 

I rinse myself off and decide that it would be better to leave full of hope

After all

3 months before they expected me I was ready

13 years before I was

they weren’t

my family

 

The wardrobe whispered the call of majesty

I obeyed my longing eyes

past the dioors and my goodbye suit

I found the two letter phrase barely in disguise and I remembered why

Heritage day:

One: I learned how to judge myself better than anyone had ever judged me

Two: It wasn’t always sunny

Three: How to fake the smile through heartache

Four: How to cause the same

Five: My clothes are cheap

Six: I am unworthychocolat_l

Seven: I knew this each time we made eye contact… after all; we are self proclaimed judges

 

So neat, tidy and fresh I walk towards the lonely seat and the non functional tv

and on the top right hand corner of the screen

A phrase in white paint screams out at me

Heritage Day:

One: My skin colour murdered my first love

Two: I inherited the skill of not caring much for those attributes

Three: My father Died of a broken heart

Four: You saved mine

Five: Our life was puzzled together by vibes and muted sentences

Six: In the end, my quirks were irrelevant and your were my indica

Seven: I fell eternally asleep with the very thoughts that days and nights before had always haunted me.

 

Palm on palm now

My eye lids find their space

No tears left in me

My heritage day is eternal

and I only grew to know that the moment I looked into you!

 

 

 

 

Reincarnation

1

I have not been very active recently.

There are two reasons:

Trying to figure out where I am going and… finding out that I have to put my kitten down today. I was supposed to wait until Saturday but he struggled immensely last night and therefore I see no reason to extend his suffering.

I do not want you guys to feel like I have given up on this site and/or my copper quest so instead of a blog (because I am rather numb today) I am sending you one of my recent poems.

Reincarnation

I wish I could touch your soul with a feather and
Erase all trace of dusty doubt
In a fragrance of humid tar I want to wrap my heart
And let this tear seep out forever

Forever in remembrance of a dying night
Deep inside a dark ray of emotion
Where souls make love in playful exclusion of our anatomy
Those moments when breath became mass in the shape of a stone in our throats

Isn’t it so beautiful when we can do naught but remain silent
And let our eyes gasp out in disbelief
When we were too afraid of ruining this eruption of fate with a touch
Too afraid of personalizing this endeavor of souls

I want to paint your soul and paste it on to my own
To look within my own being and catch a glimpse of you
Over
And over
And over

Until the moon no longer shines her love on me
When the boat man comes along
And with not much besides me and a coin in my pocket
We sail away toward the hope of a new encounter with the presence of your life in mine

Because of my little hero’s sudden illness and disappearance, I’ve been thinking about Reincarnation a lot more than usual and I think that very soon I will be sharing my thoughts on that particular subject.

Thank you for baring with me – Iva